Dance Moms Are Evil

When I was younger, my parents were supportive of my extracurricular activities... as long as they didn't interfere with school. Sometimes that was frustrating, because I wanted to do what I wanted to do. I often wished that my parents were the dedicated, band booster, forensics coach, dance mom types. 

Dear little Sri - count your freaking blessings.

The most terrifying thing on television.

The Dance Moms on Lifetime make the women on Toddlers and Tiaras look like Carol Brady. They fight like cats in a sack, jockeying for position while trying to seem like they're above such petty concerns. What's worse is they hide behind their children, swearing up one side and down the other, "I'm just doing what's best for my daughter."

The hell did you just say?

It doesn't start or stop with the moms, however. The dance coach of the company, Abby, is a vindictive horror. She never hesitates to set her students against their mothers, each others, and themselves. Once, she told a 10-year old girl who lost first place by one point that what she did was: "Great. But not good enough."

To add another level of wrongness, there is a fierce competition between the two dance companies - Abby Lee and Candy Apple. I took dance when I was a kid, and my dance teachers were kind women who emphasized learning and fun. By contrast, to call the coaches at Abby Lee and Candy Apple "harpies" would be an insult to the winged monster community.

The final twist of the knife is the earnestness and innocence of the dancers themselves. You can tell by the wide-eyed looks on their overly made-up faces that they are but pawns in these women's sickening game. I realize that I'm usually much kinder in my reviews, even to other reality TV shows, but honestly.... these Dance Moms need to be stopped.

Run, girls. RUN!