God save the Kings, Part II

After watching half of the Kings series premiere, Maggie and I called it a night ... only to be greeted in the morning with somewhat depressing news.

"Despite generally positive reviews, with some calling the project the most original new drama of the season, "Kings" (6 million viewers, 1.6 preliminary adults 18-49 rating and 4 share) was the lowest-rated program between 8 and 11 p.m. on a major broadcast network." --James Hibberd of Reuters (link to full text)

Still, Cats and I would not be deterred! Personally, I love an underdog and so the fact that Kings had a slow start only made me love it more. I'm perverse that way.

Other ways in which I'm perverse
(aka when is a douche no longer a douche?)
Maggie: DAAAAMN
Sri: OMFG!
Maggie: is [the prince] gay??
holy crap!
me: YES!
Maggie: OMG, if Ian MsShane was in my face like that I would so pass out
Sri: awwwwwwww, he can't be a gay king
suddenly, i love him
Maggie: he's still a douche
Sri: yeah
but now he has to be my favorite character
Maggie: i bet perry [the scribe] and the prince get it on
me: i dig that [the king] has a scribe
Maggie: they should have made the princess gay
that would have been awesome

Worst. Ice cream flavor. Ever.
*the princess yammers on about ashes of the city and ice cream trucks*
Sri: did you get to the ice cream truck?
Maggie: yes
and the ashes
human will
blah blah
Sri: ha
Maggie: that is a crappy metaphor
but I do like ice cream
Sri: ashes ice cream? worst ben & jerry's flavor EVER
Maggie: I would eat it if it was flavored with the ashes of my enemies

I'm a pretty, pretty princess!

Whores and puppies.
*King Silas drives out to the suburbs into a strange woman's home*
Maggie: who is this ho?
Sri: probably she's an actual ho
Maggie: that's why i said it
Sri: which is why [the king] couldn't marry her
she looks too young for him
Maggie: illegitimate children!
me: i know!!!
Maggie: the plot thickens
i wonder if he's mormon
Sri: he called the kid "puppy" ...?
this is how it's going to go down: jack will try to play it straight, no no avail - he'll come out / be outed, and the king will try to force him aside and name his bastard as his heir - we, as the audience, will feel conflicted about who to root for

Sarita Choudhury as "Helen" ... home girl represent! Kinda.

"Every-damn-body is giving me back sass today!" - King Silas
Maggie: oooh, don't talk back to the king
Sri: i know
Maggie: srsly, way over-reaching kiddo
Sri: there's folksy, and then there's just plain dumb
Maggie: oooh, I love him
Ian McShane, not david
that was AWESOME
i am clapping my hands with fiendish glee
Sri: HAHHA
trust you to root for the guy threatening people

And then things get ridiculously poetic.
*David walks up to the front lines and starts monologue-ing*
Maggie: ok, that's ballsy
oh, so poetic
Sri: i know, right?
SUPER poetic
like, ridiculously poetic
Maggie: ok, not feeling this
he should have said this to the King
Sri: he went from folksy to emo in, like, six minutes
Maggie: ok, there is no way they could hear him
inside the tank, "what the hell is that blond kid yelling at us?"
"Eh, just shoot him"
Sri: LOL
Maggie: they are too busy eating their warm entrees to listen
Sri: i love how the commander of the army is like, "ok, had enough of this - sniper that mofo!"
HAHA
Maggie: seriously, this is a little too melodramatic for me
and with the oooooo-ing in the background
Sri: i know!
Maggie: I hope that's Tom Sellek
with the mustache
Sri: lol
no it's not
sorry
Maggie: bummer
Tom Sellek makes everything better

Is there a dermatologist in the house? (aka we are easily distracted)
Maggie: seriously, watching this on HD, I feel like I could crawl into the crags in [King Silas'] face and camp out
Sri: eeewww
Maggie: it's awesome

later...
Maggie: david has a lot of moles
i hope he gets regular dermatological check-ups
skin cancer is no laughing matter
later (in other distraction news)...
Sri: awww, eli is gonna bite it … though his teeth are really clean
Maggie: they should have smeared some blood on them or something

Can you roll just one eye?
Sri: (as David) loooook - it's a butterfly!
Maggie: *rolls eye
eyes
can you roll just one eye?
Sri: NO
not unless you have a neurological condition
Maggie: living crown of butterflies!
AHHH GET THEM OFF
Sri: LOL
it's god giving [David] His blessing
Maggie: that was....odd
Sri: how can you tell that you're wearing a crown of butterflies?
i mean, it's not like you'd feel it
Maggie: maybe he has a neurological condition and can roll one eye and check
Sri: HAHAH

Final thoughts
Maggie: i liked it!
the second half was much more enjoyable with the various twists
Sri: i think this has the potential to become a fan favorite

The whole fam damnily. We're rooting for ya!

Tudors Part Deux

So I made it all the way through Season 2 of The Tudors on DVD, and then completely flaked and forgot to write about it.

Whoops.

With the premiere of Season 3 lurking just around the corner on April 5th, I thought now would be the perfect opportunity to bring you all up to speed.

Ok, so basically everyone knows the plot, right? Anne Boleyn seduces the King away from his wife, Catherine of Aragon, but since Henry and Catherine are married and the Pope won't grant an annulment, Henry breaks with the Catholic Church, creates Anglicanism, declares himself the head of the Church of England, and marries Anne. Unfortunately for her, she has only one daughter and then keeps miscarrying and pissing Henry off in various ways, so he declares her a witch and chop chop, there goes her head. Henry then marries wife #3, Jane Seymour.

Along the way there's sex (though not as much as season 1, boo), political intrigue between Henry, the cardinals, his council, and English Catholics, and papal assassination attempts!

I basically found Season 1 unwatchable; I think my friend Chris and I only made it through 3 episodes or so before giving up, but I was much more impressed with Season 2. For one, things moved along at a good clip. Catherine, who did nothing but sit around and look sad about her lot in life, got the boot fairly quickly, Henry purged his Court of those that pissed him off around episode 3, and he and Anne began to fall apart about halfway through the 13 episode season. And did I mention the Pope was played by Peter O'Toole, one of my most favorite people?

I thought Jonathan Rhys Meyers was terrible as Henry in Season 1, but he seemed to have stepped up his game in Season 2. At least watching him act wasn't physically painful for me this go around. The real surprise was Natalie Dormor as Anne. On one hand, she plots along with her family to bust up Henry's family and become Queen, so, bitch, but then when she is married she seems to actually love Henry and yet has to put up with his constant infidelity, play the part of the dutiful Queen while also trying to make sure she bears a son, so, sympathetic. She also genuinely believes in the Church of England which is kind of a refreshing spin on the whole "Anne uses religion to get what she wants" angle. Natalie Dormor had a delicate line to walk in portraying her, and I thought she was great.

All in all, Season 2 is worth watching, and definitely doesn't require viewing of Season 1. The production values on this show are staggering (the costumes alone, wowza), and overall, the acting is high quality. If it was any more than a 13 episode season it would drag, but the show does a good job at keeping things moving. And despite knowing how it ends (chop chop), there was a great deal of tension leading up to the finale.

Hopefully Season 3 can keep it up, although since I don't have Showtime I'll have to wait a while to find out.

For a preview of Season 3, check out Showtime's The Tudors website here.

Checking Back into the ER

Last week I watched my first ER episode in about, oh, 4 years. And my first new ER episode in about 5. The last one I watched was in Season 10 when Romano got the helicopter dropped on him. At that point, I was done; I mean the guy had already had his arm cut off by a helicopter, almost everyone I liked on the show had left, and I was a little busy with law school. But not too busy to keep watching ER episodes in syndication (the glory episodes!) on TNT during the day.

Quick background: when ER started, I didn't watch. I watched Chicago Hope instead since it had Mandy Patinkon. I mean, he was Inigo, hello. I didn't get into ER until I started watching it in syndication during college. Then I got hooked.

Oh, those were the days. Clooney, Edwards, Wyle, Margulies, Stringfield, Reuben....I loved them all. So when I tuned back in last Thursday it was with the promise of a return of some familiar faces. And wouldn't you know it? We got Clooney in the first 10 minutes! Thanks, NBC!

As a whole I thought the episode was really well done. Instead of trying to shoe-horn all the past characters back into the ER, we got a sub-plot in Seattle that connected to Chicago and allowed interaction between the new characters and the old. I was not expecting Eriq La Salle to show up, and the scenes between his Dr. Benton and Dr. Carter were my favorite. I think I might have actually cheered when Benton stepped into Carter's room. Oh, and if anyone knows why Carter had renal failure, let me know, k? All we got was, "it's a long story."

The end was bittersweet, however, as they often are. When Carol Hathaway explains to Doug Ross who got the kidney from Seattle, not knowing that it went to Carter, all she said was that it went to "some doctor." Missed connections! So sad!

It's going to be the end of an era when ER ends this season. After all, it's been on for 15 years, basically half my life. I feel like the epitome of the show was the episode "All in the Family" when Kellie Martin's character, Lucy Knight, was killed by a psych patient; if it's available online, I suggest you watch it. It's one of the most powerful hours of television I've ever seen.

In short, thanks for the chance to say goodbye to our fav characters, ER! Well done. And on a final note: how classy is George Clooney? How many other actors who have achieved that level of fame would bother going to back to the television show that made him? Love him.

God save the Kings

Perhaps unsurprisingly, Maggie and I are both TV Talkers - the kind of people who always have an amusing quip to interject while you're trying to watch your show. Annoying to others, but our TV Talking one of the reasons we get along so well. So every once in a while we get together to watch a show and TV Talk online. Below are excerpts from our chat (edited to reflect a more poetic version of reality) while watching last night's series premiere of Kings.

The cast is full of 'hey, it's that guy's...
Sri: oooh, it's starting!
Maggie: so random fact -
that cute blond guy is the dude from Eragon
Sri: well, i'm glad he's making something of himself
Maggie: [the queen] is the poor man's Joan Allen
have you seen Deadwood?
Sri: no
Maggie: prepare to love Ian McShane
he is so freakin' awesome
I even watched Death Race because he was in it
Sri: ha!


World-building...
Sri: kingdom of glib?
Maggie: gilboa
do you know the deal with this show?
it's a fictional kingdom
Sri: isn't it supposed to be America?
Maggie: i don't think so
it's an alternative reality
apparently, they have a neighboring nation that they are always at war with
Sri: aha

Our intrepid hero...
Maggie: so David = good with cars, dead Dad
also, adorable
Sri: he fixed [the car] with duct tape!
and got an adorable smudge in the meantime
Maggie: he can improvise
he's like McGyver
later...
Sri: clearly David is going to be the innocent everyman, surrounded by the jaded royals and their decadent lifestyle
Maggie: (as David) OMG a piano!
I am so provincial!


Our intrepid anti-hero...
Maggie: ok, prince = douche

The love interest...
Maggie: so the daughter [the princess] must be the love interest
Sri: or that health care crusader chick
Maggie: that is the daughter
later...
Sri: [the King's] giving [David] carte blanche to do ANYTHING
not only money, but power and influence are at his disposal
but then he goes and makes eyes at the princess
Maggie: wow
that was quick
*David and Michelle on the dance floor*
Maggie: everyone is looking at them, right?
Sri: yeah
Maggie: ok, that made me laugh
Sri: me too
well played, kings
well played

The other love interest...
*Reverend Samuels rubs the smudge off David's face*
Maggie: ok WEIRDNESS
hoyay right off the bat
Sri: hot
Maggie: so that's why he wasn't at the dedication [ceremony for the new capitol, Siloh]
he was rubbing some cute white boy's face
later...
*Reverend tweaks David's face into a smile*
Sri: more inappropriate touching!!
Maggie: WTF, rev?
Sri: (as the Reverend)
*bedroom eyes
*walk away


Heavy is the head that wears the butterflies...
Maggie: so [the King] had this vision of butterflies and then united the country during the war of unification
Sri: wtf butterflies?
Maggie: ok, if there was a swarm of butterflies around my head i would kinda freak out
Sri: (as the King) nooooooo!
evil butterflies, don't carry me away!

Conclusions at the end of the first hour...
Maggie: so far, I think it's all set-up
so i have difficulty judging it
establishing relationships between characters, etc
i want to see more potentially evil decision from the King
Sri: it's got a lot of recognizable tropes, but they're combined in a unique way
the premise is strong
Maggie: right
apparently, there is a lot of back-story with the neighboring warring country
Sri: there could be some interesting social commentary, there
Maggie: i like the political intrigue aspect
i am enjoying the show so far
Sri: me, too

Next time, on TV Sluts:
Is there a dermatologist in the house?
Worst. Ice cream flavor. Ever.
When is a douche no longer a douche?
Whores and puppies.
"Every-damn-body is giving me back sass today!" - King Silas
(not really, but he must have been thinking it)
And then things get ridiculously poetic.
Can you roll just one eye?

Wow. Just when you thought those Top Model bitches couldn’t get any more ridiculous:

"Six hurt, 3 arrested in 'Top Model' audition melee"

Apparently a fight broke out when people were standing in line to audition for America's Next Top Model in New York. Since they are auditioning for the next “cycle” that will feature “models” shorter than 5’7”, can we conclude that shorter women are more violent?

Or maybe someone just insulted someone else’s weave. Hey, it’s happened on the show before. Weaves and feet seem to be the insults of choice. I believe the exact phrase was, “Bitch poured beer on my weave.” And in fact, someone had dumped a pitcher of beer on another girl’s head.

No surprise, Tyra and the CW are not commenting. Look for a special episode of The Tyra Banks Show addressing female violence coming soon!

Adventures in HD

My new HD tv has finally arrived! As with most things in life, actually procuring it was not as simple as I’d hoped, especially when I spent all of last Monday waiting for its arrival in vain since the delivery company forgot to actually put the tv in the truck. Sigh. They even told me it was 15 minutes away and then when I called back and hour later, they figured out it had actually never left the loading dock. Argh.

But the story has a happy ending, for last Wednesday my television was delivered and ever since then I have been living in a world of HD. While there was nothing wrong with my old tv and watching things on standard cable still looked pretty darn good, I can’t deny that it’s kind of cool to see things with such crispness and clarity, especially Jensen Ackles. But more on him in the next paragraph.

I don’t watch sporting events, aside from the occasional figure skating and gymnastics, so many would argue that HD is wasted on me. But I beg to differ! You have not lived until you can count the pores on Jensen Ackles’ face, or seen each leaf on the trees on Planet Earth, or truly appreciated the popping colors used to set-dress the Mode office on Ugly Betty. Actors look more like actual people, less tv-fake, which lends an air of realism to shows that was previously missing.

But not everything is hunky-dory in HD land. I started noticing things that have now become irritatingly distracting. Most notably, the amount of make-up some actors have slathered onto their skin. Look, I know most people don’t have great complexions. But when I look at Jared Padalecki, all I can see now is the massive amount of foundation he wears for Supernatural. And it’s really distracting and really annoying. He’s hunting demons, not trying out for the Mr. Demon Slayer with Psychic Powers and Potentially Evil Side pageant.

But overall, I have found that while HD is not essential, it just makes watching tv a little more fun.

Not the Face!

If you've ever seen Fatal Attraction, you know Glenn Close can be scary. Actually, if you've ever seen 101 Dalmations, you know Glenn Close can be scary.

Alright, let's just say it: Glenn Close is badass and she scares me.

So far in Season 2 of Damages, I've been a little disappointed with Glenn's Patty Hewes. Last season you were never sure if she was one of the good guys or the bad guys (I mean, she had someone kill a puppy!), and that is what made her character so delicious. But this season, while Ellen has been on a crusade to bring Patty down, Patty seemed to be missing that old spark to me.

Even though we have confirmation that Patty's subordinate ordered the failed hit on Ellen that is the driving force for Ellen's revenge, it's still not clear is Patty was in on it, and the show hasn't been providing many hints this season as to whether Patty has it in her to be a cold-blooded killer.

Until this week's episode.

See, Patty has an 18 year old son, Michael. Who has apparently taken up with a late 30s, early 40s art gallery owner by the name of Jill. After a lunch meeting between Michael, Patty, and Jill that was full of awkward, Patty went down to Jill's gallery to get in the last word. And boy did she.

First she asks Jill if she is "mentally ill." When Jill laughs off Patty's attempts to insult her, Patty tells her that she'll break Michael's heart, and when she does, "I will rip your face off."

And she meant it. Just look at her!


I laughed. And then I shivered. Because DAMN. With that one line delivery, Patty's back in the game!

The Chopping Block Deserves the Axe

Last night, due to a complete lack of new television on the networks I decided to watch NBC’s new cooking show “The Chopping Block.” In general I tolerate reality TV. I am a solid fan of Project Runway and occasionally watch the Real Housewives of Orange County (it’s a problem, I know). However, I adore the cooking shows. I watch Top Chef, Hells Kitchen and have even begun hopelessly following the team from the Ace of Cakes. So I was excited to find another new and fun cooking show on prime time. IT WAS AWFUL!.

The premise really is a mix of the fun and quick moving style of Hell’s Kitchen combined with the cooking expertise of Top Chef. In last night’s episode two teams had to set up and run two restaurants (reminiscent of Top Chef’s Restaurant wars that everyone looks forward to). The problem though is that the players work in “teams.” Each team is a chef and a waiter or front of house person. Basically the show was a bunch of running around and undercooked food.

In an attempt to rip of the unique style of Gordon Ramsay they introduced Chef Marco Pierre White. Who I have never heard of (though that means little because I am an economist not a restaurateur). And at then end he yells, berates and axes a team.
This shows production was awful, the host was awful and the fake drama was awful. 3 Strikes…not so great for NBC. DO NOT WATCH!

TV thoughts...

Some random musings on the past few day's tv...

Castle: I liked it! I really wanted to love it, because Nathan Fillion, duh, but then I was worried I wouldn't, since it seemed to contain a checklist of stock tv characters (tough as nails yet still vulnerable homicide detective, clever and roguish leading man, worldly teenager, drunk yet hilarious mother), but somehow it all worked. Maybe the chemistry isn't quite there yet between the lead characters, but the mystery was interesting, all the characters were engaging, and yeah. Nathan Fillion, you know? I would watch him in anything, but this show has the added benefit of actually being fun. Is it a Bones and Moonlighting rip-off? Maybe. But who cares? I liked it. It's like drinking soda: tastes good, is sugary and fizzy, but lacking a whole lot of substance. But a person can't survive on a diet of hard-hitting drama alone, right?

Heroes: Ok, I cannot be the only person who was hoping that Matt Parkman would actually get blown-up. It's time for this show to up the stakes and have some consequences for the actions of the characters. Oh, and I need to acknowledge a shout-out for Cristine Rose as Angela Petrilli. That woman kicks some serious ass.

Friday Night Lights: Tyra, nooooooooooo! Do NOT run off with that adorable yet CLEARLY jerky Cash just because you had one bad college interview. Argh! And I love you show, but that final scene with Tim, Jason, and what's her name with the baby all crying was a little schmaltzy, even for me. Despite that little Hallmark moment, I couldn't be more pscyhed that Ausiello is now reporting that there is a chance the show will get a two season pick-up. Come on, NBC!

America's Next Top Model: In the words of Caroline, "Sandra: what a rancid bitch." Seriously, it has been years since we have seen this level of bitchery on the show, but Sandra, despite looking the most like a model of the bunch, is seriously underperforming as a model and overperforming as a bitch. And Allison? She of the scary doll and bug eyes? Her gaze scares the crap out of me. I literally had to cover my face when she would be interviewed because she scared me.

Ugly Betty: OMG! I am in love with Matt. Adorkable, smart, and worth billions. Betty, shut up and take his damn money. Now is not the time for pride. Not when you could be living on the street. Also, I like how the show finally found a good subplot for Ignacio. The Bobby Flay throw-down goof was fun and it's always nice to see Becky Newton have something to play other than vapid, even though she does it so well.

Lost: Sawyer and Juliet? I'll buy it. And she appears to have made him almost bearable. You all know about my Sawyer hate, right? With the insulting of Hurley and the squishing of the frog, Sawyer has never been my favorite person.

Burn Notice Season Finale

WARNING: This post contains spoilers.
--

There are many reasons to love Burn Notice. For the men: explosions, women in bikinis, and general badassery. For the ladies: tragic romance, men in Armani suits, and loving your mom. For everybody: Bruce Campbell.

If chins could kill...

My favorite thing about this show, however, is that is that the plot actually progresses. Some shows are so married to their original concept that they get stuck in a pattern for ten years. For example, take The X-files - an excellent show with a HUGE central mystery that never really got solved. And while that was sort of the point, in the end it was not quite satisfying for me. In contrast, the season two finale of Burn Notice was a big payoff for fans - we got to meet the man who "burned" Michael.

The Burninator.

P.S. There are no sinister pictures of
John Mahoney in existence. Absolutely none.

And then, when he offers Michael his old life back ... Michael doesn't take it! Usually such a fundamental change in a character's motivation would drive me up the wall. But because the writers had done their jobs well in laying his emotional groundwork, it felt natural. The result is that Michael stays in Miami, but it's because he wants to, not because he has to. Beyond that, the Burninator revealed that he/his organization had actually been protecting Michael, and by going rogue he would be throwing that away. This means that Michael will face a whole new battery of enemies and obstacles. The next season will be a departure from the show's original premise. It is going to kick ass.

This picture has nothing to do with what I'm saying,
but look how pretty!

United States of Tara

About a month ago there was a lot of hype about the United States of Tara on Showtime. The show is created and written by Diablo Cody, brought to fame by Juno and her former stripping career. However, I had enough television shows on my plate and didn't have the time to commit to a new one. But, I had some free time this weekend and decided to commit to watching United State of Tara on Showtime OnDemand.

First of all I REALLY liked it. The plot was interesting, the acting was great and the characters had a lot of depth.For those of you who have not heard, the US of Tara is a show starring Toni Colette that deals with a middle aged housewife who has D.I.D. (Dissociative Identity Disorder). DID is more commonly known as Multiple personality disorder. I really enjoyed Toni Colette's portrayl of a modern day Sybil. Her "alters" include Buck (a vietnam vet), T (a 16 year old) and Alice (a 50s style housewife). Each of the alters is given as much character background as the other characters and really feel like there is depth.

Joining Toni Colette is John Corbett playing Tara's husband. I LOVE him. Most people cherish him from his portrayl in Sex and the City but I have been a fan since the Northern Exposure days. He is great, dealing with each "alter" and struggling not to sleep with the non male alters.

The rest of the show centers on Tara's family life and life with the alters. The family has a young gay kid (15/16) and a teenage daughter, each tolerating the alters, having favorites and least favorites.

Each episode I watched was great and I watched all 7 episodes on demand in one sitting. I encourage everyone to check it out on Showtime OnDemand.

And for all of you Daily Show fans starting episode 3ish Nate Cordry steals the show as the teenage girls boyfriend and local chain restaurant manager.

...And now I can be at peace.

Lost is obviously a show of mysteries. It's propensity to string viewers along for years without providing answers has, for many people, led to them fleeing from the show. But for the remaining loyal viewers, this season has been a big pay-off. It seems every episode we are provided more clues, and in some cases solid facts, to help answer those dangling questions.

For me, no question has been more pressing than trying to figure what the heck is up with the giant four-toed statue first glimpsed in Season 2's finale, "Live Together, Die Alone."

Yeah, that's right. I said giant FOUR-TOED statue. Check it:


According to its Lostpedia entry, the statue was first seen by Sayid, Sun, and Jin while sailing to the Others' camp. I clearly remember watching that episode in my mother's basement (where I was living at the time, having graduated from law school only on year prior) and seeing the statute for the first time. I believe my reaction was something along the lines of: "What. the fuck. is THAT??"

For the next four years, anytime anyone who would start talking about Lost, which inevitably leads to a conversation about lingering questions, I would have to bring up the statue. Specifically, what the crap it all meant.

But now! FINALLY! We have an answer! Is it a completely satisfying answer? Hell, no. This is Lost we are talking about. But last night while experiencing another flash through time, Sawyer, Juliet, Jin, and Miles, turned around and saw this:

It's a giant, Egyptian looking colossal statute! That has to be it, right? Consensus on the net seems to be that it is a statue of Anubis, the Egyptian god of the dead and gatekeeper of the underworld. Um, depressing much? But anyway! I finally have an answer as to what the four-toes statue is/was!

This means all I have to figure it is why there is a giant statue of Anubis on a tropical Pacific island. Which shouldn't be too hard, right?

RIGHT?

And now, a word from our sponsor

Lately I've noticed that some of my favorite stars are showing up in the most unexpected places - television commercials. And some of these ads are really cute - Alan Tudyk ("Wash" from Firefly) and Dule Hill (of West Wing and Psych fame) for Direct TV is one of my favorites. Also, the Hulu commercial featuring Alec Baldwin is nothing short of inspired.

Enjoy.

Sometimes, though, an actor isn't doing a commercial as themselves. Sometimes, they're doing it because they haven't had paying work in so long that they'll take a non-speaking role in a Taco Bell ad. And sometimes you just want to clutch that actor to your bosom and cry.

Oh, Tom Lenk. If you needed money so badly,
why didn't you just come to me?

Working on a Deadline

Well, I finally took the plunge. We are living in a material world and I am a material girl, so I decided it was time to upgrade my television to an HD TV. Last Thursday I used some of my federal income tax refund to order a Sony Bravia LCD tv.

It was a good chunk of change; the recession has resulted in prices dropping a little, but these things are still not cheap. Still, I think I got a good deal and I'm really excited about getting to view all my fav shows in HD now. Just think! I will be able to see every pore on Jensen Ackles beautiful beautiful face!

But there is one downside. To get HD I need to have an HD cable box. Which means I have to trade in my current cable box. Which means I am losing everything on my DVR. EVERYTHING. Including things I have been hanging onto for over a year. It just seems cruel! But I think this might be one of those "people grow apart and move on moments." I'm just going to have to learn to deal. And watch everything on my DVR before March 9 when the new tv arrives!

What has been the hardest things to lose? So far, my Pushing Daisies Season 2 epsiodes, since who knows when and if ABC will ever decide to air the remaining last three eps of the season. Apparently, ABC has the rights to air them until September which means we definitely won't see a DVD set before then. Also, I don't live in LA, so I can't go to the Paley Festival and see them there.

I'm also having trouble letting go of my BBC America Life on Mars episodes. I've never watched the American version, since I kind of figured, what's the point? The British version is so good, I never felt a need to watch the American one. But the British version isn't out on Region 1 DVD and might never be!

*pout*

But still, it seems a small price to pay for the joy of HD. I've been hanging onto these shows for so long now, it's like they've become sentimental objects; like an art project from third grade, or my middle school band participation plaque (what? Like you don't have stuff like that lying around your house). I will try think of this as a growing experience and go from there.

In the meantime, I have been furiously trying to watch everything on my DVR before the March 9 deadline, and in some cases, rewatch before I have to say goodbye forever. So if you need me, you know where to find me. On the couch furiously trying to suck every moment of remaining joy out of my DVR.

The future of TV is Comics??? Part II

I know I promised Part II weeks, seemingly months ago, so I apologize at the start.

To recap: there has always been an interesting relationship between comics and TV, starting first with adaptations of comics for the small screen and in recent years a cross-fertilization of talent. And while comic books have been a part of popular culture for decades, they have generally been cast aside and seen as irrelevant or even just kiddy literature. But the number of people in the television and movie industry that consider comic books as important sources of inspiration should make us all pause and wonder.

The real breakthrough in this comic/television development came just a few years ago when Joss Whedon and Dark Horse Comics announced they would be printing Buffy Season 8. This was a new start, as far as I can tell. Sure in the past TV and movies continued their stories in other forms - I think of the books and comic books written after both Star Trek and Star Wars were no longer on the small or big screen. But Whedon's Buffy Season 8 was different in that this was a canonical extension of the television series and was organized like a season with Whedon acting as executive producer. Each story arc would be written by a certain writer, ala episodes, and some of the talent Whedon brought to the project were the same writers he had hired for Buffy and Angel.

I should pause and rewind to another Whedon project that proceeded Buffy Season 8 and that was the prequel to the movie Serenity. This type of comic book prequel has been seen before and since, I think of Bryan Singer's Superman Return prequel comics. While this may be a stepping stone, the idea of a canonical extension of a TV series, not just for a few issues but for the long run is exciting and new!

When the project was announced there were lots of questions around how long Season 8 would last. And many people wanted to label each issue like an episode or each arc like an episode. Once the first arc was over it became clear that neither was true and one could not find a direct one-to-one relationship between issue or arc and episode.

Buffy Season 8 was a hit, both critically and within the mainstream media. It garnered a great deal of attention and buzz and sparked some other projects including a post-Angel series. Angel: After the Fall was not structured like Whedon's other project. Whedon helped break the overall story and served as a pseudo-executive producer but the actually working of the issues was given to a Scott Lynch, a comic writer who had been doing non-canonical Angel stories for several years. I will say this about the issues I've read so far, they are far from being bad, but they miss much of what I loved most about Angel. Recently, Farscape has entered this realm with Rockne writting a limited edition series that may lead into either more issues or leap back onto Sci-Fi with webisodes. Also, after the success of Buffy there had been talks to continue Veronica Mars and HBO's Carnivale in comics, but nothing has come of either of those projects.

But back to Buffy.... it's a little hard to write a review of these story arcs so I'll provide more of my general impressions. When Whedon wrote the Buffy-verse comic Fray he created a world where demons were everywhere and where there was but one slayer. Whedon had a problem though, when he ended Buffy the show because he had created a world were there were slayerS. And that is what this season is about, trying to link the world where slayers are everywhere to the future world where there is only one slayer per generation.

Whedon's wit and drama leap from the page, but I miss the actors. It just goes to prove that writing isn't everything. That being said, it is a true delight to "hear" these characters again. To imagine the exact way Xander would respond to someone calling him Sir when he prefers being Sgt Fury. The first arc definitely set the tone for the series, and that was Whedon's intention but I was far more impressed by the second arc written by comic veteran Brian K Vaughn. He nailed both Faith and Giles to perfection. I only hope that we get to hear his voice again and see those two characters.

My biggest complaint is the issue of timing. I read them as they come out, issue-by-issue and I know many fans have opted to read the trade paperbacks, getting arcs in one swoop. I've been tempted to go that route but I feel it will hurt my comic book fan street creds! I'm getting impatient with the overall story development, particularly when it concerns the big baddy of the season, Twilight. What I do like is the way they've managed to bring in old favorites and in new and surprising ways. The end of the each issue of the first arc was just one surprise after another. And the way the most recent Fray arc ended was a revelation too, but where is it all going. I trust Whedon to get us there, I just wish it was quicker.

Gay is the New Slightly Retarded

Due to a complete lack of a social life that would normally occur on a Sunday night, I had the distinct honor of watching last night's 81st annual Academy Awards. Overall the award show was...ok. I was happy to see all the congrats given to the cast/crew/and India for Slumdog. Below I want to highlight my favorite comments from the show.

1) The clothes were ok....that's it. I didn't see anything TRULY awful or AMAZING.
2) What was with the musical tribute. Did ABC get into a room and think, how can we get Vanessa and Zack Efron into the show? OH I know a musical tribute they can sing to! Blah, i like musicals and Beyonce was fun, but overall it was unnecessary
3) Ben Stiller was hilarious. I am usually anti bit humor but I LOVE when Hollywood mocks itself
Overall it was quite entertaining to watch Ben Stiller mock Joaquin (who has either lost it or is doing a hilarious bit).
4) Why was there a vampire presenter? Look I love Twilight....Others will vouch but Robert Patterson did NOT deserve to present ANYTHING at the Oscars.
5) Heath's Family was sweet and I am glad that it didn't go way over
6) My favorite speech last night was from was the Screenwriter from Milk who had a lot to say about the rights of the gay population still be held back. It was a great speech and exponentially better than Sean Penn.
7) MY FAVORITE moment was the comedy montage with Seth Rogen and James Franco. I loved they mocked Franco playing gay. That little bit was so the highlight.
8) I liked the new presentation method. For those of you who didn't watch, instead of having one person present for the supporting actor/actress and actor/actress awards they had a bunch of previous winners. I liked how personal it was address each nominee from the heart rather than showing a clip from the movie. I am a fan.
9) Gay is the New Slightly Retarded.....well this comment honestly came from my husband. That was his response to Sean Penn winning....and for some extenct it is true.

Overall I liked the show....what were your thoughts?

Now THAT'S How You Do a Romantic Interest

I was really worried for a while there with Ugly Betty this season since the writers gave her Jesse, the douchey love interest. But now things are looking up! First Betty realized that Jesse was a self-absorbed jerkface, and NOW it seem like she's being paired up at YETI with the uber cute Matt.

And people, Matt is adorable. Quite possibly the cutest thing since Christopher Gorham. And that is saying something.

Check him out:



He looks like Josh Groban, but with less hair. I wonder if he's a good singer?

Anyhoodle, he's cute, tall, clearly likes our girl, babbles adorably, and is clearly somewhat geeky. So he meets all the TV Slut criteria for a romantic interest. Good for you, Matt! And thanks, writers! I'm always happy for a new ship to board and this one looks inviting.

Also, Molly: pregnant or has some life threatening illness? Her doctor's visit looked pretty serious, but obviously pregnancy is the first thing that comes to mind in a show like this. But I have a feeling it might be cancer or something like that...what do you think?

Thoughts on the Latest BSG (spoilers for last week's episode within!)

Umm. What?

Ooooooh. Dude. That is…..woah. Also, ew!*

That was my reaction to last week’s Battlestar Gallactica. Because they pretty much laid everything out there; who created the Cylons, why the Final Five had been on Earth, why they had been interspersed in the fleet and kept a secret from the other models….yeah. The fact that it took me multiple viewings to get it might just be because I am kind of dumb, but we are talking about a lot of information here.

In case you’re still confused, I suggest you check out Jacob’s recaplet on TWOP (even though we are disagreeing on this season of Ugly Betty, he is still my go-to guy for BSG explanations).

And then! Right when I didn’t think it could get any crazier, they had JOHN HODGMAN (from The Daily Show and those Mac/PC commercials) show up as a brain surgeon. Ok. Random. And awesome.

Wait, wait. You want this guy to operate on my brain? This guy? No way, dude.

But just in case you’re worried that everything was answered in this episode, all I can say is “HAHAHAHA.” You didn’t really think they would do that, did you? We still don’t know who (or what) Starbuck is, or what is up with Daniel, the mysterious 7^th model Cylon. Or know how everything will play out. Please be a happy ending, please be a happy ending, please be a happy ending…

If anyone has ever doubted that this is one of the best dramas ever on television, boy, were you wrong. And I find it interesting that we know that almost everything that has happened on this show occurred because Cavil decided to throw a tantrum because he wasn’t made the way he wanted. You know what, Cavil? Blow it out your ass. Nobody’s perfect.

* the ew comes from Cavil, who you remember screwed Ellen on New Caprica, and was essentially having some big oedipal moment by having sex with his mom. Since she created him and all the other 8 Cylon models. I KNOW.

Heroes with familiar faces

There have been some familiar faces cropping up on this volume of Heroes.

First: she was bitchy and useless on The West Wing, she was bitchy and made of awesome in The Cutting Edge, and I'm sure she'll be bitchy and something else on Heroes....yes, it's Moira Kelly!

Nice hair, Moira!

Second: You loved him as Justin on Aliens in America (at least you did if you were one of the 5 people who watched that show), and now he's kind of annoying and pointless as a sidekick to everyone's favorite serial killer...it's Dan Byrd!

File under things that make you go "awwww."

Finally, you know him from Damages and True Blood and pretty much every tv show ever made, the ubiquitous (and let's be honest, slightly creep looking) Zeljko Ivanek!

See? Slightly creepy, no?

Stay tuned to Heroes to discover who will be the next totally random guest star!


I miss Kristen Bell. I'm just sayin.

First Impressions of Dollhouse

SPOILER ALERT: This post contains information from the first episode of a new series, as well as some details gleaned from teh internets. You have been warned.

--

Witty dialogue, quirky and well-rounded characters, and plots that are a constant surprise - these are the staples of the Whedonverse. It should come as no surprise that I'm a fan. I own the box sets of Buffy, Angel, and Firefly. I watched Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog when it first went online. I own t-shirts, graphic novels, refrigerator magnets. And I expected that Dollhouse would be another amazing Joss Whedon creation, and that I would have found a new obsession-worthy show.


A quick recap for those who don't know - Dollhouse tells the story of a company that combines all the convenience of a temp agency with all the evil of brainwashing supervillany. People "volunteer" to become Dolls, and have their personalities wiped out so that they can be reprogrammed to the client's specifications. Whether you need a biker chick in a super short skirt (I saw Eliza Dushku's butt!), an assassin or a hostage negotiator, The Dollhouse can provide. All for an unreasonable fee, of course. The protagonist is Echo, a Doll (aka "Active") who throws off the brainwashing and starts to become self-aware.

The season premiere last Friday was good ... but not great. Somehow, Dollhouse doesn't feel like a Joss Whedon project. There were no camera-angle shenanigans, no devastating one-liners, no sudden OMFG!!1!!one! moments. Apart from the science fiction theme, it could have been any other show on the market today. And maybe I missed it, but there was no hint in the first episode that Echo is becoming self-aware. Take that element away, and the show loses all value. Echo can't exactly go on a Hero's Journey if she can't even remember what she had for breakfast. I'm sure this theme will come to light in future episodes, but I would have expected Joss to toss in a teeny, tiny hint that would have me begging for more. I can't help but wonder if this show represents a compromise between Whedon-esque writing and the tastes of a more mainstream (read: mindless) audience.

Airbrushed or naturally perfect? Hard to say...

Still, the essential Joss-ness does peek through. The scene in which the main antagonist, federal agent Ballard, is called to task by his superiors, is brilliant. The dialogue from Ballard's meeting, where he's taking flak for pursuing rumors of The Dollhouse, is cut by images of Ballard in the boxing ring, fighting a much bigger opponent. As his superiors order Ballard to drop the case, Ballard in the ring turns it around and beats the shit out of the muscular, tattooed man he'd been fighting. The message is clear - Ballard will never, ever, ever give up. You kind of love him for it.

At the end of the day, I give Dollhouse a six out of ten. But only because I'm holding it to a higher standard. Joss, don't think that having Eliza Dushku and Amy Acker bat their eyelashes my way is enough to earn you a passing grade. Throw in a little James Marsters, though, and we'll talk.

Edward Cullen, eat your heart out.

Pillow vs Pillow - Crazy Awesome

Let me start by saying that Demetri Martin: Person is one of the funniest comedy specials I have ever seen. Martin takes illogical humor to its logical conclusion with his use of props, music, and whimsy. I also loved him as Seth Shapiro in the Fountains of Wayne music video for "Someone To Love," as a guest star on Flight of the Conchords, and as a Daily Show correspondent. So it's safe to assume that I greeted the premiere of his new show, Important Things with Demetri Martin, with high hopes.

Martin's humor is the kind that has to grow on you - sometimes you don't get it right away. Not because it's so complex, but because it's so simple. "I hate meeting babies," he'll say. And wait.


Even with my expectations (or perhaps because of them) it took me a few minutes to warm up to this show. Martin started with a pretty typical stand-up routine, and I found my hand straying to the clicker. But I stuck with it and soon he had moved on to great sketch comedy, hilarious illustrations, and my personal favorite - music. He played the guitar, harmonica, keyboard, tambourine and bells while flipping a chart with a series of increasingly random jokes. Classic.


So don't just give Important Things a chance. Give it about half an hour next Wednesday, 10:30 on Comedy Central. Or check it out online. You won't be sorry.

On the Fringe

I'm calling it right now.

This guy?



Totally up to no good. Check back in a few years to see if I'm right. He just seems shady.

Not Secret NOT Boyfriend of the Week

This guy.

I felt torn over this guy. For one, it seemed that the writers of Ugly Betty were setting him up to be the big love interest of Season 3. He lived in Betty's building, was a musician, was adorable, sensitive, all that hipster crap.

But here's the thing. I never really liked him. He only wanted to talk about himself, would constantly interrupt Betty, and in general just seemed like kind of a douchebag. So I was torn, because I wanted to trust the writers, but I really didn't like Jesse.

But then! Last night! I was vindicated! Because it turned out Jesse actually IS a jerk. That he DOES only want to talk about himself. And Betty figured it out! It's all part of her learning to live in the real world or some other blah blah moral.

So, Jesse from Ugly Betty, for being a self-absorbed jerk, you are the NOT Boyfriend of the Week. Good riddance.

PS: This of course has nothing to do with the actor playing Jesse (Val Emmich) whom I am sure if a lovely person and is, as I mentioned earlier, adorable.

We Don't Need Another Hiro...

It's back! Heroes is back! It's been more than a month since we last saw our intrepid heroes, and from the looks of things, there were a lot of changes that took place. But for the most part, I would say they are good changes.

It seems that the show-runners were listening when everyone was writing and blogging about the ways to save Heroes. A lot of thing have changed for the better--no more annoying trips to the future, Maya's gone (hurray!), Bennet's motives are back to being shady, Mohinder is no longer the fly, and Hiro is adorable again! And maybe, just maybe, we'll see the return of Peter's emo bangs.

Over at Greg Beeman's blog (he's a producer/director of the show), he mentions how Tim Kring wanted this volume ("Fugitives") to act as a kind of reboot of the show, and I think as a whole they were successful. After the events of the last volume's finale, the characters have resumed something of a normal life; Peter is working as an EMT, Sylar is off on his own being eeeeeeevil (and hot!), Claire is looking at colleges and apparently pissing off the makeup department because dear god they made her up to look like a clown, Matt and Speed Racer Chick are living in semi-domestic bliss, and Hiro is the cutest thing on the earth again. Apparently he has decided to make himself a sidekick to Ando, now that Ando is the one with the powers, and set up a "lair" for the two of them in an old building. Cuteness!

Other shows have gone with the reboot idea, and I think it works in some ways, but fails in others. First, it's successful because the fans get what they have been clamoring. A return to what they have been craving. The show is simply better when we see the main characters as normal people, going about their lives, yet having these remarkable abilities. The first season was about ordinary people with extraordinary powers working to save the world. Hopefully, we'll see that again. Also, one of the most compelling parts of the first season was deducing exactly whose side Bennet was on; this volume looks to be proceeding along that vein. I never thought that Bennet would be working with Nathan to help round up the heroes, but it makes perfect sense. Well played show!

But the ways in which a reboot will inevitably be disappointing is that it means you are essentially asking your audience to forget everything that came before. If the characters are acting like the events of the last volume didn't happen, it makes us feel kind of cheated that we hung in there with the show.

But, hey, you gotta roll with the punches, and so far I am psyched for what the next volume will bring.

He's back, baby!

Seeing Double

I cannot be the only person who has noticed this.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Grey's Anatomy, Supernatural) and Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men, Vicky Cristina Barcelona) look exactly alike.

I think they might be the same person.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Can you even tell which is which?

Ok, I'll just tell you, Jeffrey Dean Morgan is Exhibit B. So far, the only thing I can find is that Javier has a longer nose and is more tan.

And this all started because I was thinking about making him the Secret Boyfriend of the Week and then wasn't sure if the pictures that were coming up on google images were actually him. In fact, I found pics of Javier while searching for Jeffrey, so clearly I am not alone in this confusion.

And just for the record, I know the "Izzie screwing dead Denny" plot on Grey's has not been popular, but I don't watch the show, and just find him hot. So my almost him making Secret Boyfriend of the Week should in no way been seen as supporting whatever necrophilia/brain tumor hallucinations/some other terminal disease cliche plot Shonda Rhimes is working here.

The Return of Big Love

For all of you polygamy and HBO fans out there, Big Love has returned to Sunday nights. I didn't post about it last week because I wanted to let the new season "soak in" first. To b honest, I am enjoying this season. For those of you who don't regularly tune into the show its about a family of polygamists dealing in an anti-polygamy world. It shows the external and internal struggles the family has with coping with their lifestyle choices and life in general.

This season has 3 distinct changes to the plot line. First is the courtship of a possible new wife (making 4 wives). Anna, our new eastern European character is considering joining the clan. I have a feeling it won't work out, but who knows. I like how the possibility of a new wife is showing a shift in the power in the family dynamic. Its clear Margie (the third wife) is pushing Anna on them so she climbs out of the bottom spot.

The second plot line is more younger characters. I assume in an effort to mix up the cast and get younger viewers the producers have added several more "young people" to the show. One being Bill's younger brother Franky...I guess we will see how it works out and how it effects ratings.

The third is less a plot line and more an observation, Bill Paxton looks HORRID. Bill Paxton, our lead male, has clearly come down with some sort of disease because he is wasting away in a very unhealthy way and I fear there are issues like cancer we will eventually hear about. I hope he gets well soon because if he loses more weight he will disappear.

If you are anti monogamy or just a big fan of non-network shows, I suggest catching Big Love on Sunday evenings at 9. Don't worry it doesn't cross over with the Simpsons or Brothers & Sisters.

Let's Do the TIme Warp Again (Lost Season 5 Premiere)

Umm. What?

Seriously. I mean, it was awesome. Totally awesome. But also confusing. But in an awesome way. You dig?

Since there is no way I arrange my thoughts in an organized fashion, I’m just going to bullet point it.

It's just a jump to the left….

--So we are following two main storylines now. The Oceanic 6, who made it off the island in the season finale last year, are all beginning to come together to make their way back. And three years in their past (or what has been the present and main storyline during the previous run of the show) we’re seeing the people who were left behind on the island. Ok, I think I got that.

--Daniel seems to be saying, and the show implying, that it’s not the island that moved it’s the people on the island. Which ok, fine. But then why did the island actually disappear? And are only some of the people skipping through time?

--I loved all the cameos the show threw at us. Anna-Lucia, Ethan, the dessicated corpse of Mr. Eko’s brother (Yemi?), the Dharma initiation video guy, the Irish Lady whom I believe is called Mrs. Hawking. All these were awesome!

--Speaking of Mrs. Hawking, I vaguely remember popping up in previous episodes (when Desmond was hopping through time? Or when Charlie was? This is why I need the previous season’s DVDs), but she seems to be involved in some kind of quest to find the island as well. And is ordering Ben around! I think she’s Daniel’s mother.

And then a step to the right….

--Michael Emerson never fails to amaze me. I really hope he gets recognized with an award for his portrayal of Ben some day. His range and the way he can manipulate not only the characters on the show but also the viewer (one minute you hate him, the next you feel sorry for him) is astounding.

--Funniest moment? Hurley hurling the hot-pocket at Ben. I kinda feel I would have the same reaction if he appeared in my kitchen.

--Neil getting the flaming arrow was predictable, and yet, I still enjoyed it. If they want to introduce new Lostaways just to kill them off in the same episode, I can deal with that. Also, Neil was the Aaron-Burr-peanut-butter-guy from the first “Got Milk?” commercial!

With your hands on your hips….

--Kate is seriously the worst fugitive ever. She drives around in her same car (which could be easily tracked, followed, or noticed) and uses her cellphone (again, easily tracked). Ugh. I really do not like her, they should seriously kill her off. And I’m sorry, I just don’t buy the whole “she’s the only person I care about because I looooove her” thing Sawyer has going on. Did I mention I still hate him? I can never forgive the frog squishing or the making fun of Hurley.

--Desmond! And Penny! <3>

--I love badass Sun. Making Kate cry…staring down Charles Widmore…all these things make me like her even more. If Ben is scared of anyone, it should be her.

You bring your knees in tight….

--Were the flaming arrow guys the original Dharma employees that we saw uncovering the frozen donkey wheel in the beginning and with whom Ben lived as a child? They had guns though so the flaming arrows thing seems needlessly dramatic and weird. I feel like it would have been completely rad if the show had actually allowed Juliet’s hand to be cut off.

--I wish Hurley would start to make his own decisions. The only reason he ran out of the house and let himself be arrested is because Sayid told him to do the opposite of whatever Ben said. Hurley just seems to bounce back and forth between people telling him what to do and allowing himself to be used for their own purposes, and it makes me mad.

But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane….

--I still want to know what is up with that three-toed statue we saw several seasons ago.

--I love the new format of no more character-specific flashbacks or flash-forwards. Just get on with the plot!

--Who is Jacob? Locke? Jack’s Dad? And where’s Claire? Is she dead? How come only the Losties seem to be the ones jumping around in time on the island?

Ok, I’m ready for next week, Lost. Bring it!

Let's do the Time Warp again!

A funny thing happened on the way to the weekend...

Friday night became one of the best nights on television.

I’m not sure how it happened. But for some reason, the universe has aligned to make Friday, the tv-network executive much maligned Friday, the place to be for drama.

First, Sci-Fi started new episodes of Battlestar Gallactica after making fans wait months for the second half of season 4. Then, NBC started airing “new” episodes of Friday Night Lights (even though they have previously aired on DirectTV, but hey, I haven’t seen them, so woot!). And in February, we can look forward to FOX moving Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Joss Whedon’s new drama, Dollhouse, to Friday nights.

So basically, that means sitting in front of your television on Friday night will be the cool place to be. Hurray! Now we all have excuses for not going out. “No, you don’t understand,” we’ll say. “I thought about going out to dinner at that awesome new restaurant and hitting up the VIP room at the club downtown, but everyone knows it’s cooler to find out if the Dillon Panthers are going to make it to States again this year!”

Or I could be deluding myself and none of these shows will do well and will all be unceremoniously cancelled in less than a month. Actually, we already know BSG isn’t coming back so: :o(

And now for some brief thoughts on the BSG and FNL premieres (spoilers!):

BSG: Well, that was bleak. I mean, I knew this show was dark, but Jeebus. Dee blowing her head off after seeming to be genuinely happy, the President burning the pages of the prophecies that had once brought everyone so much hope, the Admiral threatening to blow HIS head off, and everyone just moping around contemplating the futility of life. As for the reveal of the final Cyclon….Ellen? Woah. But now I’m confused, because I thought Starbuck finding her own dead self still in her Viper must have meant she was a Cylon, but apparently not? Unless there is another super secret final Cylon? Anyway, when even Leoben thinks this shit is crazy, you know you are in trouble.

FNL: Hurray! Oh, dear god I love this show. People who don’t watch it are seriously missing out, because it is one of the best shows not just now, but EVER. I watch the interactions of Julie with Coach and Tami, and I just think, “I have had that fight. I have said that exact same thing to my Mother. I have reacted in precisely the same way.” This show is so realistic it is almost scary. Tyra not taking anyone telling her she can’t go to college, Smash pushing himself to get past his injury, and Tami stepping up to the challenges of being principal starting with telling Buddy Garrity to shove his jumbotron, LOVE. As for Lila and Tim, meh. I know some people think Tim walks on water because he’s so hot, but the boy needs to wash his hear and he never really did it for me. So, I say again, meh. Also, watch out Matt! That new quarterback, J.D. is gunning for your position and you need to step it up.

What I learned from the Inauguration.

The greatest threat to America?

Aretha's hat.

Hide your babies and your beadwork. It's coming for you, America!

Inaugural viewings

As someone who lives inside the Beltway and within 5 miles of the Washington, D.C. mall, I am planning on hunkering down this weekend and riding out the storm of out-of-towners who are descending on my fair city for Obama's inauguration.

I kicked around the idea of going to the swearing-in ceremony several months ago, but as the day came closer and the newspapers and television news began devoting entire segments to the clusterfuck that would become our roads and public system on Tuesday, I put that idea away real fast.

Which means I will be sitting on my couch like most people on Tuesday watching the anointing of our new president on tv. But what to watch?

First of all, the key to watching news coverage of any large political event is simple. Keep the remote handy. If there is one thing I can't stand, it's pundits. And trust me, every channel (be it CNN, MSNBC, or *gulp* FOX news) will find ways to fill time with talking heads who will go on and on and on about something totally lame and nonsensical. So being able to switch channels in a hurry is key.

I plan to move between MSNBC (liberal hippies FTW!) and my local NBC news coverage. And in the morning, I am all about the Today show on NBC. I think Matt Lauer is cute, ok? So sue me.

In any event, the swearing-in ceremony starts at 11:30 a.m. and the inaugural parade is "planned" to begin at 2:30. I suggest you plan your day accordingly! And if you're stuck at work, most of the news websites will be streaming the event live. So you have no excuse to miss it!

Here are some other things to look for:

HBO is airing the Inaugural kick-off concert on Sunday at the Lincoln Memorial at 2:30 p.m. (with a re-airing at 7:00 p.m.). This is free and available for everyone, even non-subscribers, so check it out.

Also, The Daily Show will be airing live at 11:00 p.m. on Tuesday night.

If you are looking for a source beyond the usual news networks, BET will be offering extensive inauguration day coverage.

He's coming to save us!

If you come across any other inaugural programming that looks promising, feel free to share in the comments!

Superstars of Dance

Ok, so here's the thing. This show? Is not good. You know, I know it, NBC knows it. And yet I am still watching it. But here's the deal. This is the kind of show where if you are watching it live, it's unbearable. Commerical breaks after every dance performance, endless clips of filler material listening to the dancers talk about themselves, and even MORE filler of interviews with each country's dance coach after each performance.

BUT. If you are watching the show on DVR, it can be quite fun. You can skip all that other crap and get right to the dancing, which is the only reason to watch the show. It sure isn't for the actual competition, since it's never made clear what criteria the judges base their decision on (although I will say allowing each judge about 20 seconds to explain their score has been a good move since the premiere), and it's definitely not for host Michael Flatley, who is one of the most boring hosts ever.

In fact, I didn't even recognize that the host was Michael Flatley for the first hour of the show, until someone called him by name. For someone who is so charismatic while dancing, he sure comes off as an automoton as a host. And jesus, button your shirt, dude. Nobody wants to see you chest hair.

Eight countries are competing for the prize (USA, China, Australia, Argentina, India, Russia, South Africa, and Ireland) in the solo, duet, and group categories. Each country has a judge who scores the dances on a scale of 1 to 10 (although they don't judge their own country's entries).

While the judges didn't say anything during the premiere, they are now able to speak a bit before revealing their scores and have started to show some personality. Example: the South African dude is a hardass, he wants to see perfect technique. I think the Irish judge might be drunk (duh), and the Russian guy is just hilarious. He seems to delight in taking at many potshots at his country as possible, even noting that he would be killed when he returned after the competition for his remarks. The scary thing? He's probably right. Putin is a scary mofo is all I'm saying.

In the end, the show's greatest strength is also it's greatest flaw. Most of the dancers, for obvious reasons, have chosen to perform some kind of traditional dance from their country, albeit with a modern flair. But this means that it's incredibly difficult to judge the completely different styles against one another. How does one compare the South African group dancers performing Gumboot (a dance created in the gold mines of South Africa) with Irish step dancing or Indian Bhangra? It's all very subjective.

But as long as you are on board to just enjoy the many different dancers and styles, then you'll have a good time. And remember to keep that fast forward button handy.

Oh, who do I think will win? It would seem somehow un-PC for the USA team to win overall, since we are hosting the stupid thing, but I have a funny feeling it might happen. I am rooting for India though, their dances are the most interesting, IMO. The judges seem to cream themselves for the Chinese teams, but they yell a lot while dancing, which frankly, creeps me out.

Quick Thoughts on the Golden Globes

I don't really have any complaints with the winners. I adore Kate Winslet and was so happy to see her win two awards (side note: I really need to see The Reader). Her acceptance speeches were emotional and genuine, and pretty funny too. Also, I really loved Slumdog Millionaire and was so happy to see it take how the big prize. It's always great to see people associated with these movies appear so joyful at winning.

But I have to confess that my main thought throughout the evening was what the eff happened to Sting?

Srsly. What happened?

When even Colin Farrel is surprised by how cracked out you look, you know you need some help.

As for my best dressed woman pick, it's hard to say. My top three are probably Kate Winslet, Anne Hathaway, and Selma Hayek, but I don't think I can choose just one. Here's Kate Winslet at any rate:

You might think her dress is a bit boring, but it fit her like a glove, was completely classic and classy, and moved so beautifully under the lights on stage. And Leo Di looks great as always. Her speaking about him during her speech ("I've loved you for 13 years with all my heart") was really sweet. It's nice to see that all the backlash from Titanic didn't impede their friendship.

Things that I also loved about the show: Mickey Rourke winning best actor (we all love a come-back story), Ricky Gervais speech, made with a beer in his hand, of course, and Steven Speilberg winning the Cecil B. DeMille award.

The only real disappointment for me was NPH losing to Tom Wilkinson in the Supporting Actor category. Also, I was shocked as hell at Gabriel Byrne's win for In Treatment. Is anybody even watching that show? Don't worry John Hamm, I still love you.

The combination of awards + hot people + booze always makes for an entertaining show. Here's looking forward to the Oscars!